Friday, November 10, 2006

Jittery and sleepy

sleepy.
no matter how you crave for sweets, never have go nuts' peanut butter drizzle and hazelnut coffee in just one snack on a lazy friday afternoon like this. their effect is lethal - i'm terribly sleepy. big time. and i have to attend a function tonight. boo.

jittery.
i always am - as what my college friends always say, i take life so seriously - as they joke, lagi akong buhay-professional. fine, hahaha.

this sunday, i will be 26. for my 25th year - i say i quite accomplished a lot:
career-wise,
i resigned from ENTERPRISE with a belief that i developed further as a journalist - what with the assignments i did, the interviews i've done - i chased a telecommunications giant executive for his 'quotable quote'; wrote profiles about a seasoned central banker and an ambassador/banker; had a less than 20-minute phone interview with an airline executive and son of a tycoon; talked with seasoned, successful, and up-and-coming entrepreneurs; met Filipino women who are considered truly successful in their fields, among other things.

got recognized for my work with awards and nominations, and thank you really

now i'm up to another challenge - this time to be an effective writer for MoneySense - the new personal finance magazine (which first issue will be out January). i'm coping, i'm learning - and i think i have to cope and learn really fast here. this is more an engaging journalism geared toward money-savvy audiences than the distant stance of business features writing which i did in the last 1 year and 7 months, so i think i need to pretty adjust.

to date, MoneySense is my 5th full time job - and i don't take it as negative. meaning, i am just charting my path toward the excellence in media work i am aiming for - and if so be needed that my resume be filled with countless work experience, the better for me, i believe.

apart from MoneySense, i'm getting other work opportunities that not only will add to my income, more importantly, will help me be versatile with my craft, and really, i'm thankful for those who believe in me - you know who you are people, salamat talaga

i matured in handling pressure - from work, from people, from almost everything - it's just that, when i'm really tired, i just keep quiet all the time that's why many thinks i'm a snob. well, yes, i'm snob to strangers (of course! hahaha) and for those who do not really know me well - but i am true to people who can see who i really am

i matured more (and still maturing) as a daughter and as a sister - when my father died, more i learned that i have to be a daughter, sister, sometimes mother and father to my family. i am just hoping that i fulfill my role well

i'm getting closer to earn my MA degree - hopefully, i will be graduating 2008 - UP's centennial! no matter how exhausted i am from my day job then, i resolved to continue my studies, even taking only 3 units/semester. got disappointed though to get a grade i'm not expecting to have for a media subject that i took last sem. i am to blame for that. and that pesky server. hmph.

anyway, just an aside, from tuesday to yesterday, i just got busy enrolling (this time for a media, gender, and sexuality course) and to getting my grade for a subject. see, i enlisted online for a class of prof. david. but it was cancelled due to low demand so i was advised to take another class. i took dr. walden bello's Socio 227 - seminar in political sociology. don't know what i did in that class for me to earn 1.25.

thing is, my grade was not included in the master list so i had to go back and forth from socio department, to registrar, to mass comm, to socio, to mass comm, to registrar - you get the drift - to apply for a change in matriculation, as advised. for a P10 fee i paid for change mat, i spent i don't know how much for the UP ikot, toki, math-registrar rides i took just to get this done. and i did not finish that wednesday so i still had to complete everything yesterday. i almost lost my sanity for this trouble - what i know is that i never had this trouble when i was still in UST, hehehe.

but all the hassle is just part of every student's life - and i will get my MA degree no matter what.

i am quite sad though. when i was still new in UP, some thought that i was a college freshman (hehehe, see how youthful i look). but this week, i knew i no longer sport that look.

while queing to pay tuition, a friendly student introduced herself as tina. maybe just to kill time since the line was moving slowly, she asked me from what college i am, i said MassComm. she was not discouraged by my curt reply and even shared that she's a chemical engineering student. i just nodded. then she asked, "you're graduating?"

ouch. after i recovered from that shock, hehehe, i said i'm taking my masters. she asked where i finished my undergrad, i said, UST.

now, i look like a graduating student. well at least, someone who's about to finish her undergrad degree. i no longer look that youthful though, hehehe.

what i want for my 26th year:
to be more responsible. as a journalist, as a daughter. buhay-professional na, but ito ang kailangan. sabi nga ng new boss ko, kung good girl ako... (mabait naman ako ah, lalo na pag tulog, hahaha)

to be more people-oriented. i wish i can be ms. congeniality like tina who did not cringe to talk to a snob like me.

to be more intelligent in handling affairs of the heart. for those who know how complicated my love life is, wish that i end this sooner. as in sooner.

have time to be with my friends. i don't have a social life. and i miss hanging out with my friends. i want to communicate to them beyond text, mobile calls, YM, blog, Friendster - i want to be with them. and i hope with the flexy time i have now, i can do this soon.

maybe, i just want to be me...

again, never have peanut butter drizzle and hazelnut coffee - i'm still sleepy and i have to run now.