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Very aptly, Easter is "starting anew."
That was the key takeaway from the Easter Mass I attended earlier.
For believers, faithfuls, that Jesus Christ the Son of God has risen is a fulfillment of an eternal promise, as emphasized by Pope Francis in his first Easter message:
There is hope.
Love has triumphed.
Mercy has been victorious.
As I try to renew my vows to the Roman Catholic church, the message of hope, love, and mercy is what I hold dearly the most since I had a crisis:
I hoped. But hope failed me.
I loved. But loved ruined me.
I forgave. But I am, and probably would never been forgiven.
The first quarter of the year started with a renewed hope: that love would blossom again once more and forgiveness was made in order.
But I gained pain. This time, it was more hurtful.
However, I faced the challenge with much courage, with much resolution, unlike how I dealt with it two years ago. This time, I surrendered my brokenness to Him and let Him through his Son, Jesus Christ, heal me.
The painful experience taught me that every single time I thought that hope failed me; that love ruined me; that mercy was not given me, it was actually the Lord's way of teaching me to rise, start anew, hope, love, and only through such I could truly forgive myself and those who have hurt me the most.
I still have a lot to learn in this course called Life.
But now, I always try to say "thank you" for every opportunity I have. That I am thankful for the blessings that come my way, big or small.
I must admit though that I have my inner desires that need attention. But I am doing my very best to be healed from this deep-seated pain. Only then I can truly be hopeful, experience real love, and be merciful.
I am still searching, for what it is, I do not exactly know. But this time, I fully acknowledge that I am being guided in my search. And when I read this part from Manila Archbishop Luis Antonio Cardinal Tagle's extemporaneous commencement address to 2013 graduates of Ateneo De Manila University, I shed tears and smiled big for it hit right at my heart:
"A mind and heart with a clear purpose seeks God. Perhaps it can also be said that God wants to be found in the times when we feel our purpose is unclear. In the times when we feel we can’t see Him, perhaps He’s the one searching for you. That is part of depth.So let us all rejoice, the promise has been fulfilled. Have hope. Love and be loved. Be merciful.
When someone comes up to me and says, 'I feel lost,' I don’t always know what to say. Sometimes though, I just say, “ Just wait to be found. As you are searching for God, God is searching for you.'"
P.S. Moving forward, starting with this post, I will be posting with DESCOVRIR in every title --- though the topic is not new, but it will always be a discovery for you and me.